Wow, ya for sure, almost a two pound weight gain. Wowsers... I did have the chocolate cake yesterday on my birthday and we ate at PF Chang's for dinner. I had some white rice for the first time, and also ate an In and Out burger for lunch. I didn't really overeat , however I think the concentrated calories combined with the fat and sugar in the cake did me in. It's ok, now I know and I am still below my lowest dose weight so I am not going to worry for now unless for some reason I keep climbing. I anticipated a gain, but was truly suprised at how much!
It's interesting too how I can feel the extra weight around my middle when i gain a pound or two, whereas before I didn't really notice it much. I am extremely tired though and also need to concentrate on getting some sleep. I have been getting around 4 or 5 hours a night for the last few weeks with the exception of a few weekend days where i was able to sleep in. I can also feel the depletion in my reserves etc.. it will be interesting to see how the next few days develop!
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Saturday, May 22, 2010
Phase 4 178.1 lbs
Well, I have lost.. a bit over the last few days.. I am actually suprised.. I havent been eating too much though and mabye not enough its hard to say... I definately have a different outlook on food and what i chose to eat or not. I went out on a date thursday night with Mr. Chemestry to one of my favorite seafood places and they have absolutely fantastic food!! Their deserts are to die for as well... absolutely incredible and probbably for the first time ever I didnt order one or have any. I didnt miss it too much either.. I think my desire to stay thinner is greater than my desire for a raspberry torte or chocolate cake. I do have to say however that the small ammount of sugar that I have had has just been so sweet almost too much! It's my birthday on monday though and I will likely order something yummy for desert. You know come to think of it I have always loved the flavored creamers in my morning coffee but now i have stuck with the half and half due to the fact that they taste sooooo sweet.. almost too much so!! I really think sugar has been a culprit in my weight for a while. It feels so good to not be craving it! In fact I can honestly say that i am really not craving anything in particular! Its such a nice change!!
Well hope everyone is doing great and much love to all!!!
Ps. when a guy talks to you almost every night for hours at a time... does that mean he really likes you?? This guy is different from those i have been with before.. as in not as expressive and overflowing with sweet words etc... or just a brief email such as good morning , very nice to spend some time with you last night.. and thats it... I think he likes me as much as I do him, but its kind of hard to tell. Anyone have any input on this? My guy friend said most guys are like that...hmmmm.
Well hope everyone is doing great and much love to all!!!
Ps. when a guy talks to you almost every night for hours at a time... does that mean he really likes you?? This guy is different from those i have been with before.. as in not as expressive and overflowing with sweet words etc... or just a brief email such as good morning , very nice to spend some time with you last night.. and thats it... I think he likes me as much as I do him, but its kind of hard to tell. Anyone have any input on this? My guy friend said most guys are like that...hmmmm.
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
P4 159.9lbs
Wow... is all I can say... and also apoligize for not sharing for the last week!! Holy cow!! Annnnnddd what a week it has been for sure!!
Well I have transitioned from phase 3 to phase 4, and so far have been able to maintain at around 160 within a pound or so... I feel that is a success!!! Yea!!! I have noticed though that it seems to be sugar that triggers my weight gains, and if I avoid or limit the ammount of sugar, the fat or carbs dont seem to bother me too much! I haven't gone carb crazy though which is interesting.. i havent yet had a pasta dish like spaghetti or chips and salsa.. that kind of thing.
So far so good and I promise I will try and keep updated more!
The biggest news is that I am really falling for Mr Chemestry!! Ohhh yeaaaa big time. It is very interesting though and as I sit here tonight thinking about it I have realized that as with the process of losing weight and changing or shifting your perceptions of yourself the same needs to happen with relationships. Its an interesting challenge to try and accept and love yourself as you make the leap to allow and accept that possibly, just perhaps there is someone else out there that also can.
He is experienced in Yoga and Mediatation and shared with me a meditation to try which while was a bit akward while doing actually helped sooooo much! I think that there are alot of positive changes coming up , hopefully all for the better! Oh and I forgot to mention.. he is a natropath who is extremely knowledgeable about herbs, and health things. He eats mostly raw fruits and vegi's etc.. and had a quesadilla last weekend as well as pizza... i had to laugh as he said he could hardly remember the last time he had eaten pizza or cheese... wow... yeah about as far removed from what I am used to as you could imagine.. didn't someone say opposites attract??? LOL
Hope everyone is doing great and just taking it day by day!!
Well I have transitioned from phase 3 to phase 4, and so far have been able to maintain at around 160 within a pound or so... I feel that is a success!!! Yea!!! I have noticed though that it seems to be sugar that triggers my weight gains, and if I avoid or limit the ammount of sugar, the fat or carbs dont seem to bother me too much! I haven't gone carb crazy though which is interesting.. i havent yet had a pasta dish like spaghetti or chips and salsa.. that kind of thing.
So far so good and I promise I will try and keep updated more!
The biggest news is that I am really falling for Mr Chemestry!! Ohhh yeaaaa big time. It is very interesting though and as I sit here tonight thinking about it I have realized that as with the process of losing weight and changing or shifting your perceptions of yourself the same needs to happen with relationships. Its an interesting challenge to try and accept and love yourself as you make the leap to allow and accept that possibly, just perhaps there is someone else out there that also can.
He is experienced in Yoga and Mediatation and shared with me a meditation to try which while was a bit akward while doing actually helped sooooo much! I think that there are alot of positive changes coming up , hopefully all for the better! Oh and I forgot to mention.. he is a natropath who is extremely knowledgeable about herbs, and health things. He eats mostly raw fruits and vegi's etc.. and had a quesadilla last weekend as well as pizza... i had to laugh as he said he could hardly remember the last time he had eaten pizza or cheese... wow... yeah about as far removed from what I am used to as you could imagine.. didn't someone say opposites attract??? LOL
Hope everyone is doing great and just taking it day by day!!
Sunday, May 9, 2010
Day 16 P3 159.8
Ok well first of all Happy Mother's Day to all of you lovely mom's out there!
So sorry I havent posted.. I figured that rather than post each day i will break it down right here..
Day 13 - 160.8 +1
Day 14 - 161.7 +.9
Day 15 - 161.4 -.03
Day 16 - 159.8 - 1.6
Ok so I think that for now it looks like my body wants to stabilize around the 160-162 area.. which I am going to try and maintain... Its very interesting... I am happy thus far and feel good about not wildly swinging one direction or another.. even though my ldw was 164 for the last week and a half or so my weight wants to stay within the 160-162 range. Less than a week to go now with phase 3 and then will start adding in carbs modestly and see what happens..
I have to confess though over the last couple of day's i have cheated some with carbs,.. I have a weakness for cheese quesadillas and indulged in one on friday at work and also late friday night.
Thursday night i had some sushi.. which has some white rice in it ... so far though it hasn't completely shocked my system or anything and my weight still seems to want to hover in that lower range. I am optomistic that if I use caution regarding the carbs when phase 3 is done that I will be able to maintain the losses. One of the biggest shifts that has been interesting to me is changing my diet and cutting out the carbs.. i am a total carb lover and my diet previously was mostly carbs. I think the tradeoff of using those as a compliment in my meals rather than the primary food source is worth it. I would still love to have some pasta and pizza though. LOL
Ok so onto Mr. Chemestry right.. LOL ok, well it has been an interesting week thus far regarding this... the main reason that I havent posted is due to the fact that we have been spending hours on the phone with each other and went on a date thurs night (hence the sushi) .. I have to laugh at myself regarding the date thursday night because I probbably couldn't have orchistrated what not to do on a date any better.... for instance.. I was sooo nervous and couldn't relax and I just said and did the wrong things throughout,.. here are a couple of examples .. when we were up in Park City for dinner and talking he said it would be fun to get a hotel and spend the weekend up there sometime.. either alone or with the kids and dog etc... and also suggested hmm.. mabye we could take a road trip sometime.. that would be fun right? He then said of course if I am inviting you I would pay etc.. he said I generally take care of the expenses when I am out with friends or other people. He then said how do you feel about that etc.. and I was quiet for a few minutes (while thinking in my head.. should I dispute that or offer to pay for half etc.. if that were to happen.. what is the correct way to handle that statement) so I said... ummmm... well I think that makes you a very generous person.. and then moved on to something else.. UUUgh.. there is my first mistake. I talked to one of my male friends and he said oh my gosh... turn that around and see how you would feel if you suggested to him to take a roadtrip or stay in a hotel etc sometime and he came back with .. um... i think it sounds like you are a generous person... LOL ok so I totally didn't see the forest for the trees on that.. as I said was too caught up in trying to make a good impression and just wasnt myself.. and then driving home we got talking about camping etc.. and he said he had spent alot of time in the mountians overnight, and sometimes for extended periods.. to which i replied "by choice?" He turned to me and said lady are you kidding? Do you think I am homeless or something?? and at that point i was like oh my gosh... ok.. well here is the coup de grace ok... we get back to my house.. kids are at their dads and we are alone.. so what do i do you might ask yourself... why I bring out my color profile book on personality's and proceed to give him a psycological exam... uuugh... don't even ask how this was taken ok.. bad.... ya.. so needless to say he inturupted this by kissing me and I let it go at that point.. however wanst ready to go too far so a bit later he ended up leaving , but it was soooo akward... anyhow.. meanwhile I am second guessing myself and thinking I probbably missed the best opportunity that i had to really be intimate with this hot sexy guy that I could bounce a quarter off any part of his anatomy.. LOL sigh.. long story short I didn't hear from him friday and later that night after the suggestion of a couple of friends sent him an email explaining that I was just not myself that night and was too worried about impressing him. If i had it to do over again I would just go with the flow and be myself. etc.. long story short he emailed me back and said he was still processing things and that at this point had yet to come to any conclusions one way or another but said you can imagine what was going through my head when you give me a psycological profile test designed to determine compatibility or quash any potential disasters etc.... well long story short he did call me yesterday (Sat) and we did end up talking last night for about 5 hours or so... which has been fairly typical all week. Not sure where this is going to go but we will see huh? so there you have it.. I have learned some valuable lessons this week .. 1- to just be myself and not worry about impressing anyone.. and 2- I am terrible about dating and terribly intimidated by hot sexy men... LOL
So sorry I havent posted.. I figured that rather than post each day i will break it down right here..
Day 13 - 160.8 +1
Day 14 - 161.7 +.9
Day 15 - 161.4 -.03
Day 16 - 159.8 - 1.6
Ok so I think that for now it looks like my body wants to stabilize around the 160-162 area.. which I am going to try and maintain... Its very interesting... I am happy thus far and feel good about not wildly swinging one direction or another.. even though my ldw was 164 for the last week and a half or so my weight wants to stay within the 160-162 range. Less than a week to go now with phase 3 and then will start adding in carbs modestly and see what happens..
I have to confess though over the last couple of day's i have cheated some with carbs,.. I have a weakness for cheese quesadillas and indulged in one on friday at work and also late friday night.
Thursday night i had some sushi.. which has some white rice in it ... so far though it hasn't completely shocked my system or anything and my weight still seems to want to hover in that lower range. I am optomistic that if I use caution regarding the carbs when phase 3 is done that I will be able to maintain the losses. One of the biggest shifts that has been interesting to me is changing my diet and cutting out the carbs.. i am a total carb lover and my diet previously was mostly carbs. I think the tradeoff of using those as a compliment in my meals rather than the primary food source is worth it. I would still love to have some pasta and pizza though. LOL
Ok so onto Mr. Chemestry right.. LOL ok, well it has been an interesting week thus far regarding this... the main reason that I havent posted is due to the fact that we have been spending hours on the phone with each other and went on a date thurs night (hence the sushi) .. I have to laugh at myself regarding the date thursday night because I probbably couldn't have orchistrated what not to do on a date any better.... for instance.. I was sooo nervous and couldn't relax and I just said and did the wrong things throughout,.. here are a couple of examples .. when we were up in Park City for dinner and talking he said it would be fun to get a hotel and spend the weekend up there sometime.. either alone or with the kids and dog etc... and also suggested hmm.. mabye we could take a road trip sometime.. that would be fun right? He then said of course if I am inviting you I would pay etc.. he said I generally take care of the expenses when I am out with friends or other people. He then said how do you feel about that etc.. and I was quiet for a few minutes (while thinking in my head.. should I dispute that or offer to pay for half etc.. if that were to happen.. what is the correct way to handle that statement) so I said... ummmm... well I think that makes you a very generous person.. and then moved on to something else.. UUUgh.. there is my first mistake. I talked to one of my male friends and he said oh my gosh... turn that around and see how you would feel if you suggested to him to take a roadtrip or stay in a hotel etc sometime and he came back with .. um... i think it sounds like you are a generous person... LOL ok so I totally didn't see the forest for the trees on that.. as I said was too caught up in trying to make a good impression and just wasnt myself.. and then driving home we got talking about camping etc.. and he said he had spent alot of time in the mountians overnight, and sometimes for extended periods.. to which i replied "by choice?" He turned to me and said lady are you kidding? Do you think I am homeless or something?? and at that point i was like oh my gosh... ok.. well here is the coup de grace ok... we get back to my house.. kids are at their dads and we are alone.. so what do i do you might ask yourself... why I bring out my color profile book on personality's and proceed to give him a psycological exam... uuugh... don't even ask how this was taken ok.. bad.... ya.. so needless to say he inturupted this by kissing me and I let it go at that point.. however wanst ready to go too far so a bit later he ended up leaving , but it was soooo akward... anyhow.. meanwhile I am second guessing myself and thinking I probbably missed the best opportunity that i had to really be intimate with this hot sexy guy that I could bounce a quarter off any part of his anatomy.. LOL sigh.. long story short I didn't hear from him friday and later that night after the suggestion of a couple of friends sent him an email explaining that I was just not myself that night and was too worried about impressing him. If i had it to do over again I would just go with the flow and be myself. etc.. long story short he emailed me back and said he was still processing things and that at this point had yet to come to any conclusions one way or another but said you can imagine what was going through my head when you give me a psycological profile test designed to determine compatibility or quash any potential disasters etc.... well long story short he did call me yesterday (Sat) and we did end up talking last night for about 5 hours or so... which has been fairly typical all week. Not sure where this is going to go but we will see huh? so there you have it.. I have learned some valuable lessons this week .. 1- to just be myself and not worry about impressing anyone.. and 2- I am terrible about dating and terribly intimidated by hot sexy men... LOL
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
Day 12 P3 159.8 -1.1lbs
Ok now this was a total suprise to me this morning... seriously even after eating the quesadilla and tortilla which is a nono right now... apparently I am still not eating enough.... I am now 4.3 lbs under my ldw.. I know I am suppose to stay within 2lbs. I need to eat more apparently.
Well I made a concious effort this morning. Bought real heavy cream at the store yesterday and had like 3 cups of coffee this morning with eggs and cheese. Ate as much as I could, but I am never hungry for the first few hours when I wake up. I forced myself and also brought in some chicken salid with a salid for lunch today. When I got home I ate some crab salid that I bought at the store... just the immitation stuff but its good.. and tonight I am going to cook up some chicken with peppers and onions.. hopefully will turn out good. I am drinking my favorite red wine tonight too....
Havent heard from Mr Chemestry yet today although we did exchange a couple of emails last night. We will see... I will keep you posted for sure!!
Well I made a concious effort this morning. Bought real heavy cream at the store yesterday and had like 3 cups of coffee this morning with eggs and cheese. Ate as much as I could, but I am never hungry for the first few hours when I wake up. I forced myself and also brought in some chicken salid with a salid for lunch today. When I got home I ate some crab salid that I bought at the store... just the immitation stuff but its good.. and tonight I am going to cook up some chicken with peppers and onions.. hopefully will turn out good. I am drinking my favorite red wine tonight too....
Havent heard from Mr Chemestry yet today although we did exchange a couple of emails last night. We will see... I will keep you posted for sure!!
Day 11 P3 160.9 -.01
Hey guys!! Well I was happy to see that I didn't have a major gain from my weekend of being reckless.... In fact I am sooooo hungry... K well I ended up eating a quesadilla (sp)? from work today... had to have something to eat and it sounded soooo good so I went ahead and got one with extra cheese and salsa. Didn't eat until I got home around 4pm after shopping and had some premade chicken salid with some lettuce. It was really good. Didn't eat anything else.
Soooo.. Mr Chemestry called me twice in the afternoon and I called him back when I got home. Went well, suprisingly and the funny thing is that this guy could have anyone he wanted... Body to die for.... seriously..... when we met for coffee on Sat I am never at a loss for conversation but found it really hard to concentrate.... LOL anyhow.. I figured I would probbably never see this guy again etc.. and what did I have to loose by inviting him over and hanging out with my friends and I as we celebrated my friend Misty's graduation from college. Anyhow.. figured he would run for the hills but at least my girlfriends and I would have some eye candy for the night. I have NEVER, NEVER, NEVER gone out with a guy that has that kind of a build. WOWSERS is all I can say about that...
He is actually a really nice guy! Kind of shy etc, but very polite but reserved. Well I was suprised as heck when he called me... I mean really? Ok, I have to share.. we made out like teenagers sat night, but at the same time didn't go further.. and actually I cant recall when i have ever kissed someone on a first date, so this was TOTALLY out of character for me... anyhow at one point he reached around and could kind of feel my stomach... (clothes on etc..) but I remember telling him that I was self concious about that because of the stretch marks etc.. and that I have had kids. Even though my stomach is flatter after loosing the weight I still have the stretch marks and looser skin in that area. Its so interesting how you seem to carry stuff like that with you..ya know? I have always been comfortable with someone before exposing any part of myself.. (not that I was exposing anything) but you know what i mean. Anyhow... it will be intersting to see what happens. I know ulitmately that whomever I am with will love me for more than the physical stuff and that is how it is suppose to be anyway....
Soooo.. Mr Chemestry called me twice in the afternoon and I called him back when I got home. Went well, suprisingly and the funny thing is that this guy could have anyone he wanted... Body to die for.... seriously..... when we met for coffee on Sat I am never at a loss for conversation but found it really hard to concentrate.... LOL anyhow.. I figured I would probbably never see this guy again etc.. and what did I have to loose by inviting him over and hanging out with my friends and I as we celebrated my friend Misty's graduation from college. Anyhow.. figured he would run for the hills but at least my girlfriends and I would have some eye candy for the night. I have NEVER, NEVER, NEVER gone out with a guy that has that kind of a build. WOWSERS is all I can say about that...
He is actually a really nice guy! Kind of shy etc, but very polite but reserved. Well I was suprised as heck when he called me... I mean really? Ok, I have to share.. we made out like teenagers sat night, but at the same time didn't go further.. and actually I cant recall when i have ever kissed someone on a first date, so this was TOTALLY out of character for me... anyhow at one point he reached around and could kind of feel my stomach... (clothes on etc..) but I remember telling him that I was self concious about that because of the stretch marks etc.. and that I have had kids. Even though my stomach is flatter after loosing the weight I still have the stretch marks and looser skin in that area. Its so interesting how you seem to carry stuff like that with you..ya know? I have always been comfortable with someone before exposing any part of myself.. (not that I was exposing anything) but you know what i mean. Anyhow... it will be intersting to see what happens. I know ulitmately that whomever I am with will love me for more than the physical stuff and that is how it is suppose to be anyway....
Sunday, May 2, 2010
Day 10 P3 161.0 -1.5
Ok... so i know , this is just crazy,.. but in all fairness honestly i cant remember what i ate yesterday except a cheese stick in the morning and then a double chicken breast sandwitch around noon. Major loss... need to eat something for sure... I am typing this hungover as heck...
Yesterday went to coffee and met someone for a date... it went well and ended up having a couple of friends over to celebrate my friends graduation from college. (went to the ceremony yesterday morning) ... Ended up being up and drinking run and diet coke like all night.... invited my "date" over to join us very impromptu and he did but showed up late.. but endedup staying up all night with us and omg.... talk about chemestry there... he is a great looking guy... ya for sure... it was totally fun... but I am soooooo hungover... sooooooo hungover.. i have to go and eat something... have been really beating my body up this weekend with alcohol and lack of sleep.... I am kind of alarmed to see how much I have lost even since friday... and despite the calories from the alcohol have not been eating enough apparently.... going to rest, eat and take it easy today... hope i can recover.... uuuugh.....
Love to all
Yesterday went to coffee and met someone for a date... it went well and ended up having a couple of friends over to celebrate my friends graduation from college. (went to the ceremony yesterday morning) ... Ended up being up and drinking run and diet coke like all night.... invited my "date" over to join us very impromptu and he did but showed up late.. but endedup staying up all night with us and omg.... talk about chemestry there... he is a great looking guy... ya for sure... it was totally fun... but I am soooooo hungover... sooooooo hungover.. i have to go and eat something... have been really beating my body up this weekend with alcohol and lack of sleep.... I am kind of alarmed to see how much I have lost even since friday... and despite the calories from the alcohol have not been eating enough apparently.... going to rest, eat and take it easy today... hope i can recover.... uuuugh.....
Love to all
Day 9 P3 162.5 -.08
Holy cow... what a fun fun time at the wine party yesterday! Whohoo! I think I am breaking out of the weight gains... but am a couple of pounds lighter than my ldw. So I ended up eating smaller meals and trying to keep my energy up... wow... suprised that despite the alcohol I have been losing too.
Have had a good weekend datewise also. Met some really nice people yesterday and have a date for coffee today.. we will see how it goes...
Have had a good weekend datewise also. Met some really nice people yesterday and have a date for coffee today.. we will see how it goes...
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